Welcome to Day 1 of the Self-Esteem Challenge, I’m very happy to have you here!
Let’s dive straight in.
Today we’re going to be reflecting on all your wonderful gifts and strengths. This is because the habit of feeling confident is something that is incredibly complex. It’s determined by everything from our neurochemical makeup to our environmental circumstances, and the interplay between them.
Fact: Serotonin levels can modulate our posture, and our posture can govern our confidence.
Unfortunately, this means that for many of us, we may not have had the fortune of being naturally confident, or life circumstances have slowly (or quickly) taken that self-belief away.
To start with, our brain has an inherent negativity bias, so it’s easy for all the positive traits we possess to go unnoticed. Fortunately, all it takes is a bit of attention and diligence to remind yourself of why you’re worthy of self-esteem.
Deep down you know you’re strengths, even if you’ve temporarily forgotten to pay attention to them. And with a little exploration, we can bring them to the surface and start to recondition your unconscious mind, so feelings of calm and confidence become a more fluid and natural process.
Self-esteem begins with self-love; loving who you are, accepting who you are, and appreciating your gifts. If you can’t appreciate who you are, you’ll never have the self-esteem that you deserve.
The nonviolent revolutionary Mahatma Gandhi said: “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve love and affection.”
American novelist Mark Twain said: “You cannot be comfortable without your own approval.”
So now it’s time to ask yourself this simple, but powerful question:
Do I love myself?
If the answer is “no” – that needs to start to change.
Today. In fact, right now.
If you want to be comfortable in your life, you absolutely MUST approve of yourself. It doesn’t matter what others think; it matters what YOU think about you.
I like to think of the formula for love as this.
LOVE = Attention + Affection + Appreciation + Action
Self-love means that you:
1. Give yourself the attention needed to create change
2. Approach yourself with an attitude of kindness and affection
3. Appreciate all aspects of your self: past, present and future
5. Take action when necessary, not just when you feel like it.
It’s not easy to do this all the time, but even just a conscious attempt to do so will drastically change your perspective.
So let’s begin by taking time to love yourself. This is the foundation of self-esteem.
Take out a piece of paper.
I want you to write down TEN things you appreciate about yourself. This doesn’t need to be overcomplicated.
Are you great with spreadsheets?
Do you have a good sense of humour?
Are you good with kids?
Do you manage your finances well?
Are you empathetic?
You MUST come up with at least ten things you like about yourself. No shortcuts!
If you can keep going, come up with more than 10.
After you’re done, take the sheet of paper and tape it somewhere you’ll see it A LOT (your desk, the fridge, your bathroom etc.). You want this to be in front of you on a regular basis.
Remember, you are valuable and should love yourself. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!
P.S. Stay tuned for tomorrow because we’re going to be learning some powerful affirmations that can recondition your mind to accept and love yourself.
See you tomorrow!